Unique Valentine's Situations

I have had an extremely stressful week full of tears and misunderstandings, but it seems to be getting a lot better. I am so thankful that today, on Valentine's Day, I will have an undoubtably delicious dinner with a young gentleman that will distract me from that for a couple hours.

In any case, here are a couple links I have found in the last couple days that deal with the issues of love and this day that many people do not know what to do with. It's unfortunate when married people play this day out through obligation, or single people reject it because they do not see a connection to their lives. Hopefully these links will help avoid that.

General

• From Mars Hill's Resurgence, an article on the history of Valentine's Day.
• My own review of The Four Loves on YLCF and on this blog.

Marriage

• From Young Ladies Christian Fellowship, two articles on how to be a good wife, and one on being a good husband.
• From Bounless Webzine, an article for men on romance.
• From Ben Stuart, a sermon on the dynamics of marriage. (Takes time to download)
• From Mars Hill, the homepage for the Peasant Princess sermons on marriage, with links to the ten sermons along the bottom- highly reccomend.

Singleness

• From one of my friends, a personal opinion, full of wisdom, on her singleness.
• From Young Ladies Christian Fellowship, an article on contentment in waiting.
• Again from Young Ladies Christian Fellowship, my favorite poem that explains purpose in waiting.
• Also from Young Ladies Christian Fellowship, a collection of articles meant to serve as encouragement through singleness. One, Two, Three, Four.
• From The Scriptorum Essays, a quote on singleness:

""Thus the bachelor is on the defensive. Not only does he seem to be surrounded by couples, but he feels that he must show his couple-potential by being seen with a woman, even if he’d rather stay home and read a book.” Those words by Sheldon Vanauken come from his book Under the Mercy (pp. 152-62). He laments the decline of the nobility of bachelors, “men who are so wrapped up in some mighty ambition that they don’t have time or freedom for marriage. A monk or a priest in the service of God. A scientist or poet reaching for the stars. A naval officer for whom the Fleet comes first. An explorer or adventurer… there are, in fact, a great many reasons for bachelorhood, and perhaps fewer reasons for marriage than there used to be… There is a great deal to be said for calling oneself boldly a bachelor. It is a strong, independent-sounding word and suggests a deliberate choice. A way of life. ‘Unmarried’ is a bit like ‘unemployed’ or ‘unfed’—negative and crippled. ‘Single’ (‘one-legged’) isn’t much better. But bachelor makes a statement, and it conjures up a tradition…”"

(For citation purposes, here is the link, but I do not want to promote all points in this article.)

My point is, work on it from where you are. If you're single, take advantage of that time and do not be ashamed of your opportunity. Take Valentine's Day to show your love for someone else. If you're in a relationship (dating/courtship or marriage) then use this day to bless your significant other. Make them feel special and loved, however that looks for them. Everyone can always better their relationship with attention. Happy Valentine's Day!

Little Chelsea Lamb

I saw this picture this morning, and so many thoughts rushed to my head that I had to write about it. First off, it's at face value a powerful image to being lost and the metaphor of the Good Shepherd:

"I myself will tend my sheep and have them lay down, declares the Sovereign Lord. I will search for the lost and bring back the strays. I will bind up the injured and strengthen the weak..." (Ezekiel 34:15-16a)

In the photograph we can see the youth of the lamb. Perhaps he's still enjoying his adventure away from the others, but we can begin to see fear creep into its face. He feels lost and alone. He doesn't understand what's going on. He's looking around and doesn't see his mom. We know the Shepherd has a more aerial view, and can see the rest of the flock in the distance. He can bring the little lamb back.

Once I read the verse in Ezekiel, I thought about the common association the Christian community has with lamb and lost. It's probably because most verses deal with salvation (Psalm 119:176, Isaiah 53:6-7, Matthew 25:32). We have all heard that God "searches for the lost and brings back the strays," that He rejoices in the one found sheep (Matthew 18:12-13). The metaphor is usually used with evangelical undertones. However, the verse continues to say he "will bind up the injured and strengthen the weak." I myself don't think of him as a Shepherd often when I'm still in the flock.

"The Lord is my shepherd, I shall not be in want. He makes me lie down in green pastures,he leads me beside quiet waters, he restores my soul. He guides me in the paths of righteousness for his name's sake. Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me." (Psalm 23:1-4)

There's no mention of being lost. Read it again, closely, especially if you've heard it before. The Shepherd is actually "with me". I feel with God right now- maybe not 48 hours ago, but yes, now. I had run ahead of the shepherd, and I'll be back in that green valley one day, but next time with His presence and blessing.

What I'm dealing with now is missing the valley. It is a good valley- why not go now? Why do the other sheep insist on sticking around here for so long? That is my valley. However, I hold onto the faith that my Shepherd knows what he's doing- and has the power to guide those sheep too, if he feels it's best. No matter how amazing that valley is (for it really is), it's not worth being there without my Shepherd.

Photograph by Matt Blakemore, http://www.flickr.com/photos/simpologist/142876597/in/set-1587781/ . Creative Commons licence: Attribution and Non-commercial.

Purity

Purity is something that people generally try to achieve, but find hard to define. There are some things that are impure, and some things that are pure. Then there's the blurr in the middle, with a faint but definite line separating the pure fuzz from the impure fuzz. Furthermore, different situations may be more or less tempting to others, that may or may not result in a compromise of mental purity. Basically, it's a personal level.

God makes it clear that "whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things." (Phil 4:8).

I've been doing a lot of thinking on what purity means in the last two weeks. I have come to a conclusion: that ring there (points to her ring above) is not a promise to my friends. It's not a promise to my parents or even my future husband. It's a promise to God, and He holds me to account for everything I've done. I think a major stumbler in the whole purity social sector is the emphasis on the motive. True Love Waits talks about the joy in being able to tell your spouse that you came to your marriage pure, but what about God? He has higher standards than your physical purity- He cares about the state of your soul and mind as well.

I have had some deep struggles with this in my past, and they continue today. These last two months have been like riding a bike uphill steadily, but now that [I think] I've gotten to the top, the view is amazing. I'm reminded of God's faithfulness and find joy again in spending time with Him. Our God is good. :)

Status: Unemployed

I'm going through a really frustrating period right now. Everywhere we hear that Calgary has a need for employees. There are help wanted signs everywhere... so why can't I get a job?

I am being picky, I fully realize that, but I'm also not going to settle for a job I won't enjoy because I really don't need work right now. My weekly allowance covers everything, and I really don't spend nearly as much money as I used to. My only "social" spending is Starbucks once a week with Aneca and Justine, and I have figured out how to only spend $1.85- those glass bottle frappaccinos. I used to go to movies too much for my own good, but they're so expensive here that unless I really want to see something, I don't.

I applied at the Keg. They didn't need another expo.

I applied at Chapters. They never called back.

I applied at Traditional Pastimes Quilt shop. They didn't need help.

Neither did Watermill Bakery.

I babysat Benjamin (see previous posts) for a while, and learned a lot, but they moved in December.

Nectar is across town, so Mom doesn't want me to apply there. Understandable.

I'm trying to figure out what I'm supposed to learn through this. Patience, probably. But I feel like there's more than that. I really think my job in Texas was more than a coincidence, and I wanted to work there so badly, I remember begging mom to let me. Looking back, I find that so weird. Why would I want to hostess? It's completely out of my introverted personality. I'm going to be spending a lot of time at this new job; I bet you there's a reason He's holding out. Just like babysitting taught me a lot of important things I'll need to know later, I bet this job will too.

There's one more place I want to apply at... after that I have no idea. I'm going to head over there on Wednesday. Prayers would be appreciated.

Wait

I'm usually not much of a poetry person, but this is probably the greatest poem I've ever read. I've been thinking about it a lot over the last few days, and thought I'd share it with you folks.

Wait, by Russell Kelfer

Desperately, helplessly, longingly, I cried;
Quietly, patiently, lovingly, God replied.
I pled and I wept for a clue to my fate...
and the Master so gently said,"Wait."

"Wait? you say wait?" my indignant reply.
"Lord, I need answers, I need to know why!
Is your hand shortened? Or have you not heard?
By faith I have asked, and I'm claiming your Word.

My future and all to which I relate
hangs in the balance and you tell me to Wait?
I'm needing a 'yes', a go-ahead sign.
Or even a 'no,' to which I'll resign.

You promised, dear Lord, that if we believe,
We need but to ask, and we shall receive.
Lord, I've been asking, and this is my cry:
I'm weary of asking! I need a reply.

"Then quietly, softly, I learned of my fate
as my Master replied again, "Wait."
So I slumped in my chair, defeated and taut,
and grumbled to God, "So, I'm waiting...for what?"

He seemed then to kneel, and His eyes met with mine...
and He tenderly said, "I could give you a sign.
I could shake the heavens and darken the sun.
I could raise the dead and cause mountains to run.

I could give all you seek and pleased you would be.
You'd have what you want, but you wouldn't know Me.
You'd not know the depth of My love for each saint.
You'd not know the power that I give to the faint.

You'd not learn to see through clouds of despair;
you'd not learn to trust just by knowing I'm there.
You'd not know the joy of resting in Me
when darkness and silence are all you can see.

You'd never experience the fullness of love
when the peace of My spirit descends like a dove.
You would know that I give, and I save, for a start,
But you'd not know the depth of the beat of My heart.

The glow of My comfort late into the night,
the faith that I give when you walk without sight.
The depth that's beyond getting just what you ask
From an infinite God who makes what you have last.

You'd never know should your pain quickly flee,
what it means that My grace is sufficient for thee.
Yes, your dearest dreams overnight would come true,
but oh, the loss if I lost what I'm doing in you.

So, be silent, my child, and in time you will see
that the greatest of gifts is to truly know me.
And though oft My answers seem terribly late,
My most precious answer of all is still "Wait".